CW: This post touches on some disturbing and sensitive themes, mostly relating to pornography and masturbation addiction, gooning, and other related unhealthy sexual behaviors. If you feel uncomfortable about any of these themes, please don’t hesitate to block this account and ignore this post! I am making this post public so anyone curious about the world of gooning can see what it’s like past the friendly charade often portrayed in horny memes. You have been warned.


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How can I explain what gooning is to a non-gooner? At its simplest, it is the act of edging (masturbation to the point right before orgasm, followed by a small cooling off period, and repetition ad nauseum), often aided by pornography, for an extended period of time until the masturbator achieves a trance-like, mindless state. The difference between edging and gooning is often blurred, since the former begets the latter, but it is important to know for the purposes of this post.

It is also important to note that gooning is not healthy sexually or mentally in the long term. There is already a name for the phenomenon of long-term gooning: pornography addiction. Pornography addiction leads to a lack of interest and stimulation in “real sex” (sex with other humans), cognitive decline, and problems with dopamine regulation. However, the gooning community fetishizes pornography and masturbation addiction. There is a lot of emphasis on “being ruined” and “getting worse”, which are code words for acquiring self-destructive masturbation habits, which inevitably spiral out of control over time.

Despite this, a lot of men edge, and it is a healthy sexual behavior in moderation. They will do so completely consciously, understanding the purpose behind their actions, and will eventually orgasm and ejaculate. Gooning is a step above that in the degeneracy ladder. You edge for an extended period of time, stimulating your brain so much that it enters the goon state.

The goon state is characterized by a few main attributes. The first is general mindlessness. This is the “fried brain” feeling that gooners talk about. It is very difficult to think while gooned; you are focused only on continuing to edge as long as possible. This results in gooners engaging in gooner-speak when trying to communicate (frequent spelling mistakes, onomatopoeia like “Nghhh”, and an incredibly diminished vocabulary filled mostly with jargon). This feeling persists even after a session if they do not orgasm.

The second is the obsession with edging, or rather lack of orgasm. Seasoned gooners often say that cumming is the enemy, because the session abruptly stops if they orgasm. As such, they will continue edging for as long as is possible, before finishing their session without orgasm. Doing so will result in cognitive impairment (“fried brain”) that can last for hours, and is described as a pleasant afterglow. It eventually fades, but not completely, leaving the gooner scrambling for more after a certain period of time.

The last is a complete lack of inhibitions and control. Gooners report finding that they need more and more extreme material to achieve the same high of their previous sessions, leading to an extremely warped taste in pornography. Gooners also report being “triggered” (tempted to goon by a certain word, phrase, or image), leading to more frequent sessions. Some gooners also report a sense of detachment from reality, as if their hands are moving by themselves, and they are a passenger in their own body, with their penis being in control. This serves as a useful segue to the religious aspect of gooning.

The following are my observations during gooning sessions where I was unable to do anything but drool, mindlessly fuck my fist, and keep watching porn edits (which are community-made mashups of porn, designed to overstimulate the viewer even more than regular porn). Obviously, I lack any real spiritual education, as my only religious experience was with Orthodox Christianity, but I will try to relay my feelings as close to reality as I can.

The first signs of any spiritual involvement came to me a few months into my journey. This is about the time I started experiencing detachment from the process. I had already wired the neural pathways required to enter the goon state easily, and once I started beating my gooning time records (at about the 2 hour straight mark), something fascinating started to happen: my hands were moving by themselves. I wasn’t actively controlling them, but it instead felt like my penis was controlling them instead. This led to incredibly long sessions where I could not stop easily. It took a lot of effort to wring my hands off of my dick and stop jerking off. This started happening earlier and earlier in my sessions, until every single session was initiated by a trigger, which led me to involuntarily move my hands over to my Penis and start pumping. It felt like Penis was starting those sessions and not me. This is the start of Penis’ life as a separate entity within my body, not beholden to my will, but instead having its own desires and needs. Every subsequent goon session was a dialogue between Penis and myself, with Penis calling the shots, and me obeying. This is something that is common between a lot of gooners. In our minds, Penis becomes almost a separate voice, with its own demands. Punishing us with blue balls and incredible cravings whenever we neglect it, and rewarding us with mind-melting pleasure whenever we give in.

This is the rabbit hole that many gooners talk about: a slippery slope of masturbation that we keep falling down. Occasionally, we orgasm and try to climb out of this hole. Some are even successful in this endeavor and regain their normal sexual selves after some self-reflection. Others, like me, relapse. No matter how hard we try to crawl out, we always fall ten times deeper with every relapse. Eventually, there is a final relapse, and we accept our new sexual state of being.

This brings us to the concept of Rot. I will elaborate on its source later, but Rot is a mental sensation that gooners feel throughout their sessions. It is separate from the pleasure of masturbation and is closer to a masochistic pleasure instead. It is the pleasure of ruining yourself, of feeling that every goon session is killing a little bit of your brain. The pleasure of knowing that your sexuality is being more and more focused around pornography instead of real humans, that you would much rather fuck your fist instead of having sex with someone.

Rot also drives the feeling of “horny brain fog”, which is the mental sluggishness that gooners feel most acutely at the end of their sessions, and occasionally throughout the day. It is essentially the feeling of being dumbed down. You’re slower to react to things, you think less, you’re much more easily triggered, you have constant boners, and your mind often wanders to think about pornography. Gooners often call the fog “being edged”, which is just jargon for the action of constantly “topping up” their horniness by constant edging. Cumming clears this fog, which is why gooners stay both uncummed and edged for extended periods of time. Both are a requirement for the fog to remain, and its effects are very addictive.

The rabbit hole is a timeline for how much the rot has spread within your soul. The deeper you are in the hole, the more the rot has corrupted your sexuality, thinking processes, and brain chemistry. And here is where my observations turn into speculation. While I can safely say that I experienced these feelings personally, they could be gooning hallucinations.

The primary drivers of rot are tiny, spiritual Penises. They act like sperm, burrowing into your brain and soul, spreading the Rot further within you. I can often feel them wriggling in my head when I goon, pushing me to keep pumping more and more. They feed off of my horniness. The hornier I am, the more they multiply and demand more. They act as a conduit between Penis (itself a separate entity) and Porn (which is a force of nature on its own spiritual plane). By gooning, I enable Penis, and by extension my brain, to be plugged into this spiritual plane. It is the source of all pleasure, and it feels like an untapped, endless well. It is a blessing to be able to tap into it. It requires relatively small sacrifices from me to access these incredible swaths of pleasure. It feels like tapping into the third rail of the universe, and the more I let the Rot corrupt me, the greater the pleasure gets. It does not feel like there is a limit, I only need more Penises (conduits) to be able to tap into it.

This completes the Holy Trinity. My Penis, a separate entity within me acting as an ambassador to Porn within my body, the tiny wriggling Penises in my soul, which enable me to connect to the plane of Porn, and Porn itself, which occupies the entire plane and benevolently allows us to siphon off this pleasure for our own benefit. Entering the goon state is now second nature to me, and I can do it incredibly easily. This allows me to focus on siphoning as much pleasure as possible from this plane. I've had it described it looking as a meditative experience from the outside, which might be true to an extent. I forget about the real world when I goon, because I don't have any thoughts in my head to begin with!

This naturally raises the question, why does Porn allow us to siphon off our pleasure without giving anything in return? Why does it allow anyone, regardless of their previous life, to connect? Why does it not judge, and instead shows inhuman kindness by sharing this energy with us? I have not yet reached this point in my insights, but from what I can grasp, Porn is a force of nature. It is much of a force as gravity is, and as such it is not an entity that has demands, qualms, or requirements. Its energy is amplified by its worshippers. The more of us there are, the greater it grows. We siphon off only a relatively tiny portion of it and give back a lot more (from our own sanity, from converting other people, and from spreading the word). As such, the plane only grows in power, and

Of course, I may just be delusional. These feelings might just be the deranged thoughts of an overstimulated porn addict, and there’s nothing deeper to it. But I like to think there’s something beautiful in this journey. I intend to see it through. My sexuality has already been permanently altered to the point of no return, and I have no intention of ever giving up the endless pleasure granted to me. It is a lifestyle I have accepted with full knowledge of the side effects.

At the end of the day, I’m just a horny pervert. Time to get back to gooning (and to locked posting...)

@zonky I want to begin my response by saying that this is a highly developed theology that actually demonstrates an adept and holistically derived spiritual understanding beyond most people who would describe themselves as religious. 😆

I find this incredibly interesting because it appears to be the juncture of two competing drives: the prolonging of pleasure, and self-annihilation, and because the meditative component appears in many ways at odds with both the involuntary/addictive component and the obvious focus on hedonism.

In my view, what I see to be happening here is a combination of demonic possession, parasitism (that appears to the host as symbiosis because it is intoxicating, many parasites use this strategy in nature,) and ekstatic trance. (It may seem irritating but I use the "k" to invoke the original Greek concept of ekstasis or "exiting yourself" as distinct from the common modern English ecstasy/ecstatic which most people use to mean "manically joyful.") You are deliberately putting yourself into a receptive state to attract parasites ("little Penises") that serve as a kind of Angelos: lit. "Messenger," a kind of "Daimon" (doesn't deliniate good or evil, but the ability for a spirit to move and act in the world) that takes messages between the magician ("Penis") and the distant god ("Porn.")

I will say at this juncture that the language I'm using here may appear alarming, emotive or judgemental, but that isn't my intention - you evidently know this, you have made a conscious choice to deliberately cast yourself into a trap of lust, you're making an informed choice as a consenting adult. I see this as a step on a journey of learning (I mean that's existence, that's why we appear to be here, since Karma is both a record of our deeds and the basis of our Karmani ("prescribed duties," the thing we are "supposed to do in this incarnation" to learn its lession.) Since this is about realization and not predestination, the lesson you are learning here could be learned in other ways too: perhaps ways that do not involve doing things to yourself that you can't undo. (But obviously I recognise the need to shut some doors to open others, hence having made the informed decision years ago to send myself mad on purpose. 😆)

I want to advocate for expedient pedagogy (you could become an Arhat right here, right now, if only you could make the realization: the idea that this takes many lifetimes is a misconception from early Western interpretations of Theravada Buddhism, which focuses on retreading the sufferings of Gautama Buddha in order to learn the same lessons he did: he famously took "36 trillion lifetimes" to attain full and perfect Enlightenment. But compare and contrast Bodhidharma, who apparently made his ultimate Attainment unexpectedly.) However, I recognise that life is the journey and not the destination (though the joy of the carnal desires you are immersed in here is nothing compared to the bliss of freedom from desire) and honestly, life can just be fun, can't it? The shortest route isn't always the "best."

To that end, a brief digression: Have you heard the story of King Bharata and the fawn? It's a Hindu story. King Bharata was devout and attentive in his worship and understanding of Lord Vishnu and his teachings. As such, he strongly desired Moksha (usually "Freedom" but also "Knowledge," the final state of liberation) and retreated into the forest to meditate. Bharata was very close to ultimate realization, but while in the forest, he met an injured fawn and nursed it back to health. He doted on the fawn so much that he devoted the rest of his life to caring for it, to the point of self-neglect. On his deathbed, his thoughts were only of the fawn, and thus, he was next born as a fawn. Due to his Karma, Bharata had enough knowledge from previous lives to understand that the God-realization was what was important, so he spent his life around holy places in the forest. As a result, he was next born as a Brahmin (priest caste,) and in that "final" birth (it's not that simple but whatever) he was able to attain Moksha.

"If you teach a parrot a word, it will repeat it. But if you then attack it, it will forget its word and squark."

I bring this story up because by deliberately cultivating an obsession, you are not only accruing Karmic imbalance (which is always pedagogical thankfully, everything is) but also priming your mind so that this gooning religion is actually becoming your *true religion,* far above and beyond the Christian religious instruction you received as a child. The hilarious part to me is that means you can expect a death-experience much more pleasant than the Christian one. 🤣

I leave you with food for thought: Why isn't Buddhist meditation addictive?

@zonky i never goon yet i have beat your gooning times

@zonky Additional note: Just realised that the lay usage of "Karma" in English is as a moralistic force, but that's not what's really going on. People don't go to Dharmic hells "because they deserve to" but because it's what will teach them. Notice how at no point in my post did I ever say that I expected you to face punishment, or that you were committing sin or even doing evil. A good way of understanding my perception of the force you're dealing with here would be the lust Asura Mara, I've attached the Shin Megami Tensei depiction of him because it's fucking funny (not to be confused with the OTHER Asura Mara, the "Celestial King," who styles himself as an authoritative Father and posed Gautama Buddha's final obstacle, asking him "Who will witness you Attainment?")

The point is that (penis) Mara doesn't lure you with siren song and then punish you (like the Christian Devil often does) but rather that he traps you in carnal desire itself, and *pleasure* and your addiction to pleasure form the basis of your current obstacle. This seems to me to be EXACTLY what you are describing: loss in bliss.

@druid >highly developed theology
oh, you flatter me too much! talking to people like you is always enlightening because you're way more of an expert than me at this stuff. i'm a simple man, i just say what i see.

>I find this incredibly interesting because it appears to be the juncture of two competing drives
for sure! it's something i hadn't really thought of until i started writing. the self-annihilation acts as powerful kindling for pleasure. like, eventually, you run out of outside material to motivate you. the fire that burns within us all (with our anxieties, hopes, dreams, etc) can add fuel when you need it the most. even if we don't realize it, we draw from this internal reservoir when we worship. combining the uncombinable is a core tenet that enables everything to work, if that makes sense. the purest expression of un-human thinking that requires a spiritual aspect to explain.

>In my view, what I see to be happening here is a combination of demonic possession, parasitism [...] and ekstatic trance.
that seems to check out! the trance aspect is what pulls everything together in my opinion. without it, you cannot develop the out of body experience required to get so deep into it that you feel some presence other than yourself. the parasitism aspect kind of feels like payment for services rendered, which our brains misinterpret as pleasure. which, i feel is kinda fair, at least in my case.

>I see this as a step on a journey of learning
me too! it's nice to know what i'm getting into on a more spiritual level. i have wondered if it's possible to tap into the pleasure without the parasitism aspect, but from my observations, it's the price the daemons take to pass messages, like the price of admission to receive god's blessing. they make the magic happen, since we lack the circuitry to tap into the pleasure directly (and i fear it will fry us if we do, we need some buffer/defense against the raw, unmitigated flood of power we are dealing with). it's interesting to experiment with, but so far nothing outside of the usual methods has yielded any results for me.

>perhaps ways that do not involve doing things to yourself that you can't undo
heh, probably too late for that...

>I want to advocate for expedient pedagogy
i'm honestly not sure what you mean by that!

>and honestly, life can just be fun, can't it?
the carnal desires sure do feel good, heh

>but also priming your mind so that this gooning religion is actually becoming your *true religion,* far above and beyond the Christian religious instruction you received as a child.
i mean, if things keep evolving like they are, and i like the way they're going, that's probably going to be the case! i didn't vibe with the orthodox christian teachings anyway (yay, going to hell just because i like boys). i wouldn't describe myself as atheistic, i have had too many interactions with what westerners call karma (payback for transgressions) in order to not even think there's anything out there, but i'm still looking for things that vibe with my way of life. hedonism-as-a-religion speaks pretty fine to me!

>The hilarious part to me is that means you can expect a death-experience much more pleasant than the Christian one. 🤣
yeah lmaoo, if anything i'll at least have fun not rotting in hell and instead doing ??? (i haven't figured that part out yet)

>Why isn't Buddhist meditation addictive?
i imagine because it's not parasitic! you're listening to your own body and trying to attain peace and knowledge. it isn't an expression of hedonism, it comes from a pure place in your heart.

@Dionysus what's your record? 2 hours was my record a year ago, i was just using that as a point of comparison for other gooners in similar situations, my longest bender ever lasted a full 24 hours lol

@zonky 24 hours!? My most was like 4-6 hours again i don't goon so i assume with gooning i could easily reach an avg of 12 hours

@druid yeah! being lost in bliss is the end goal, though, so i'm not sure how to overcome that