Conversation
i talked to my mom about how guilty i feel about my brothers death. this is the first time a family member has engaged in a conversation with me about it. usually when i bring it up i get the "well we all knew he was heading this way anyway" talk. i dont really feel better or worse. everyone feels guilty, but no one could help. it was nice to hear im not alone in my guilt, and my reasons for it are shared.

it's been about 5 months now? its still just as sad. i have to remind myself that grief is a heavy backpack that you don't have to carry around. you can pick it up and put it down
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