holy shit lmao

https://translate.kagi.com/?from=en&to=Maoist+Standard+English

Comrades, consider this social phenomenon: you are at a fellow youth's dwelling for a night of collective rest, and you engage in decadent bourgeois intimacy on the furniture. Suddenly, the patriarchal figure calls and instructs, "No, she prefers the other hand for such activities." You remark to the girl, "Your father is attempting to provide technical guidance on your exploitation." But she replies, "I have no father." This reveals a profound contradiction! Who was the voice on the telecommunication device?

Let us posit that you have adopted a reactionary and decadent stance. Let us say, hypothetically, that you have even engaged in anti-social behavior. Fine, and if you were such a deviant element, you would be subject to my base exploitation, correct? Then, speaking hypothetically, you would be my little vessel for filth. Now, let us also say you are a daughter of the patriarchal authority.

Now that we have established that you are both a deviant element and a daughter of the patriarchal authority, I believe you would agree with the collective when I say that you deserve a corrective struggle session. Am I not correct? A deviant element deserves to be disciplined, and as I represent the patriarchal authority, you are my subordinate, so I am the one who must administer the punishment.

@nyx What reactionary nonsense have you dared to utter against the people's vanguard, you running dog?
Let it be known that I have achieved the highest revolutionary honors in the People's Liberation Navy,
leading countless strikes against the imperialist bandits of amerikkka, with over 300 confirmed liquidations of class enemies. I am a master of people's guerrilla warfare and the premier marksman of the entire revolutionary armed forces. To the revolution, you are nothing but another target for rectification. I will liquidate your reactionary presence with a precision never before seen on this Earth; mark these revolutionary words. Do you believe you can escape justice for spreading such counter-revolutionary filth over the internet? Think again, oppressor. Even now, I am mobilizing the secret network of the masses across the PRC and your IP is being traced by the people's intelligence; prepare for the revolutionary storm, maggot. The storm that will sweep away the pathetic, parasitic existence you call a life. Your time is up, little revisionist. I can be anywhere, at any moment, and I can end your reactionary life in over seven hundred ways, using nothing but the hands of the proletariat. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed struggle, but I have at my disposal the entire arsenal of the People's Marine Corps, and I will utilize it to its full revolutionary extent to wipe your miserable, bourgeois hide off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you had realized the holy retribution your "clever" liberal comment was destined to bring upon you, perhaps you would have held your treacherous tongue. But you lacked the discipline, you failed to reform, and now you pay the price, you goddamn fool. I will rain the fury of the masses upon you until you drown in it. Your fate is sealed, little counter-revolutionary.

@rowb1t I was just about to post this one lol

@nyx it was the imperialist scum trying to trick you

@nyx same mind also if you put mse in the source box it gives definitions which are pretty funny too

@nyx I wish someone would say this to me ><

Welcome to Translunar Academy! You, lucky technopath cadre, have been accepted to a program that will transform you through revolutionary struggle, granting you abilities the masses have yet to grasp. Your mind and the machinery of production shall become a unified force; the æther that connects the international proletariat across the stars will be your domain, technopath!

Just after your 14th birthday, you received this urgent dispatch. Before your political and technical training can begin, you must complete your student registration for the service of the people:

State your gender identity for the collective record:

@nyx The female masses harbor a profound dread of my revolutionary consciousness;
The aquatic resources recoil before my dialectical presence;
The male counterparts avert their gaze from my vanguard trajectory;
As I traverse the path of struggle, the reactionary fauna is silenced by the weight of my proletarian authority;
I stand as a solitary beacon of the vanguard upon this desolate, pre-revolutionary landscape.

You sit down by the water nearer to Comrade Akiko, but not in a way that violates proletarian discipline. After studying the revolutionary signs on your terminal, you seek to build solidarity through dialogue. “How did you learn the mass line of interacting with birds?”

[Akiko felt revolutionary optimism]

“I learned from the educator Reina,” Akiko signs. “You must study her curriculum. She teaches the dialectics of cybernetics.”

“I am currently engaged in that study!” you sign.

“You are fortunate, Teacher Reina grasps the objective truth of all things,” She emphasizes this sign with great revolutionary fervor. “She perceives the universe and the æther through a correct materialist lens. She says she encountered a contradiction in the æther that revealed the interconnectedness of the whole world, allowing her to serve the animals, plants, and fungi as effectively as machines. She spearheaded the construction of this entire collective garden. You will find great value in her class!” Her signs are punctuated by enthusiastic movements of spirit.

“It is a triumph of production; the biodiversity here is immense,” you sign.

“Indeed! Many lack the class consciousness to appreciate this complex system. A sustainable grove of this scale is impossible without a mobilized mycelium network, thriving insect collectives, and the vital labor of the birds. TLA is a self-reliant, self-sufficient ecosystem. If this colony persisted for epochs, these organisms would undergo a revolutionary evolution into a new branch of life.” Your terminal struggles to keep pace with her ideological outpouring. “But such a thing is impossible; a colony cannot be sustained indefinitely. One would require…” As the sun sets behind you, she points across the pond to a red star—the color of the revolution—in the sky. “A planet.”

“You speak of the revolutionary transformation of nature—terraforming?” you sign.

She nods. “It is the fundamental law of life to expand beyond its old boundaries, to bring revolution to inhospitable lands, transforming both the environment and the self, taking what is stagnant and turning it into a living force for the future.”

@winter the world i wish i got, instead of this crap-ass one lol

@nyx chinese amogus