she also manipulates the world not just my mind but her manipulating the world is closely linked to her manipulating my mind in the meta of these dreams because I slip in and out of altered consciousness and the whole world becomes part of my lesson

@technicallydifficult I hope you grow a meaningful and firm relationship with God that survives this

@dracula purgatory is temporary!

really nauseated smdh

in my dreams about God shes incarnated as a very normal but very spectacular woman who usually looks late 20s mid 30s but has been as young as 18 and as old as late 40s early 50s. she may be physically pretty or not and often takes a different form from scene to scene without me or her acknowledging any change (but she is always female looking). more than any other personality attributes she is distinguished by kindness, purity, and meekness. she excels in everything she attempts and may appear surprised by this and never brags. she is wise in a totally unassuming way, but she doesnt show it until its time for a lesson. the lessons are where she shows her otherwise totally hidden power. she manipulates my mind and senses to teach me beautiful things laden with symbolism, usually things about myself and our relationship or about yoga. I always forget most of what she says upon waking. she possesses both a human and a divine nature much like christ and she often is so absorbed in her human role that she "forgets" her superlative divinity, or is so absorbed in her own blissful God-nature that she has trouble perceiving the world in finite human ways when called to, especially with regard to perception of time. she is incredibly magnetic but totally humble. is there any wonder I'm infatuated with her? now while I have had some dreams that are quite prophetic or that contain genuine God-revealed lessons for my life I consider the purpose of these dreams not to be instructive or revelatory because I forget her lessons but to instill a desire to know and love God in me. when I wake up I always feel heartbroken even though I have experiences throughout the day that make me feel God is with me. but those experiences never move me as much as my dreams of her. sigh.

i wonder do you know parsley as

my dream last night was incredibly and mind-bendingly beautiful being infatuated with God who appears in my dreams is not easy

@technolyze its a seder with lots of special symbolic foods on little plates kinda like jew tapas

@technolyze the jews should thank God instead for their continued existence as an ethnoreligious group after thousands of years of fuckery

@paula8 @nyx @salt you said you were close to my age

@salt fuck off youre my little brothers age

@nyx @salt but then we wouldnt have lizzie

on this pesach reminder that the passover story is a myth and the Israelites were Canaanites who became monolatristic and then monotheistic. also the angel of Gd would never kill a bunch of children.

@risperdoll @monkey I say as I live for the sense pleasure of sushi and tom yum soup

@lizzie @djsumdog @risperdoll how does it apply to christology

@monkey @risperdoll also I dont want to learn to masturbate because I have a lot of spiritual experiences and masturbating in the holy presence of God is a grave sin. also I think its a waste of time on sense pleasure for an aspiring yogi like me.

@monkey @risperdoll actually it was a really bad chuddy smut story on an incel forum that I was reading to own the incels by seeing how pathetic they are. it was cringe but the pussy eating part was mesmerizing. despite being a malebrained king of swords I am spiritually quite sapphic

@lizzie @djsumdog one of the magi?

@djsumdog I believe the summum bonum is yoga (unity with God through the path of meditation, action, or knowledge)

@risperdoll I'm 28 -_- honestly there are three huge barriers to me transitioning. first off I'm extremely depersonalized so I stopped feeling dyphoria about my breasts and curves years ago. second off I'm extremely lazy and hate putting work into things. third I'm extremely vain and I'm hot now and dont want to be less hot